STOP is not the new GO

For those of you who've been following my blog for awhile, you know many of my pet peeves revolve around bad drivers. You name it and I've probably bitched about it!

It seems that around these parts, many people think coasting through intersections where there's a STOP sign is okay as long as there are no cars coming. I'm convinced that many of said people probably don't know the definition of STOP.

I also know that many people around here don't comprehend what YIELD means. For those of you out there who don't know the definition, YIELD, in traffic terms, means that oncoming traffic has the right-of-way and that you pause until the time that you can safely proceed. If you don't get that, you shouldn't be driving.

Almost every day I deal with this one busy intersection where there's a YIELD sign. I can't tell you how many times I've been cut off because of people who react improperly to the sign. Yesterday, some twat hole actually laid on his horn at ME because I didn't let him go! Not only was it rush hour so traffic was slow-moving, but the douche bag pulled up next to me in the other lane and lucky me with my window down, was greeted with an earful. In usual Koolio form, I had a few choice words for him in return:

Hey dumbass! YOU had the YIELD sign which means that not only do other drivers not HAVE to let you merge into traffic but that you just have to hold your fucking horses! But if you want to drive with one fist up your ass and the other hand on your dick, be my guest, just don't EVER get in my fucking way again or I'll report you to 911 as a reckless lunatic who's smoking crack while driving. Have a nice day, fucker!

With that I waved the bird at him high and hard and grinned as wide as I possibly could. I could tell you that he wasn't happy but that would be an understatement. :)

Fucking Congress needs to pass a law that allows people like me to pick off these asswipes with a sawed-off shotgun. Just sayin'.

seriously now...why bother?!

Lemme' just lay it out there for y'all...I have a zero bullshit policy.

So when this dumbass from my past contacted me on Facebook, trying to friend me, and acting like I wouldn't remember how she dissed me several years back, I let her have it...

"Hey Girl! Remember me? I was so bummed we lost touch years ago. B. just told me you are on Facebook. Wanna hook up again?"

Uh, you mean much like I'd wanna' have someone squirt acid in my eyes?! Yeah, thanks, I'll pass.

Here's how the story goes...

Years ago, when I was still married, I was feeling lost and lonely and looking to connect with people as I felt no connection to my then-husband so I registered myself on some penpal website. There was this gal from another country and we connected. Never having met, we continued corresponding with each other for years through Email and IM.

When some psycho blogger didn't like something I had to say on her blog and turned all her little blogging friends against me, this gal friend of mine had some words for this psycho blogger.

We blogged together. Literally. Until the day that someone hacked our blog, probably the psycho blogger or one of her cohorts. After that, this gal and I had both set up separate blogs and it wasn't long after that I noticed that she had become good blogging buddies with some of the psycho blogger's friends.

While I certainly don't tell anyone who they can be friends with, this bothered me. I think we had "known" each other well enough that we wouldn't do that to each other. Or at least I wouldn't have done it to her or anyone else I felt I had established a friendship with. I explained to her my feelings and she laughed off my words. To say that it was hurtful, would be an understatement. It was much later that we lost touch mainly because I couldn't be bothered with someone I felt was a back-stabber.

There was also another incident not long before all that happened in which I learned she couldn't be trusted. When I was on that dating site, I was in touch with this one guy. One night I was IMing with him and her separately and it became too much of a chore so I just set up a conference where we could all chat together.

Shortly before all that happened, I had been trying to get her to give me her phone number so we could chat on the phone and she either ignored me and/or just kept coming up with excuses. So we're in touch with that guy, it was close to New Year's Eve and he asked me to call him on New Years so I did...only to learn that she had sent a picture of herself to him all dressed up for the New Year's Eve party she was attending with the message "Don't tell Koolio I'm sending you this.". Yep, she was trying to keep secrets from me. Luckily, this guy felt uncomfortable enough about this situation that he told me that and that they had also talked on the phone. Nice, huh?!

I decided I'd had enough of her bullshit so I stopped visiting her blog and stopped communicating with her. Suddenly, there was a rush of Email messages that she wrote me which I chose not to respond to and then I chose to delete her from my address book completely so that all her messages went to spam. She sent me some E-card as well which I chose not to open.

Fast forward to tonight when I got that message from her. My response to her was the following...

Yep, I remember you. You were the one who dissed me when I needed a friend. You probably don't remember and it doesn't really matter at this point so let's just leave it at that.

I knew exactly how she would respond, with trying to lay all the blame on me for the friendship falling apart, and reminding me how she'd written Emails that I never responded to with her not once owning up to the true nature of why I stopped corresponding with her.

I ended up blocking her on Facebook so that she can never contact me again. Then I decided to Email the guy who told her I was on Facebook to let him know I wasn't pleased that she had contacted me only to find out that he had his privacy settings set so that I couldn't view his profile. Since it makes no sense to me to have someone on your friends list and then not allow them to view your profile, I deleted him from my friends list. I'm not like some people on Facebook who just add people to their friends list for the sake of adding. I'm not on the same quest as others appear to be to see who can have the most people on their friends list.

Who has time for all this game-playing bullshit?! I don't know about y'all, but I left high school a long time ago!

friends who play nicely together

The person who shall not be mentioned here is being nice to me. Don't be too shocked, it won't last long, I'm sure.

He knew I wasn't pleased with my cell phone so he bought me a Motorola flip-top, ordinarily a $200 phone, through his work for $15.00. He was told it had a new battery but it didn't so on Saturday I stopped by the store to get a new one.

On a Saturday, probably the busiest day of the week for most if not all businesses, there were three customer service reps and one of them took off to take his lunch break. And then there were two. Just call me Agatha Christie. Heh.

Needless to say, there were more customers that customer service reps and the number was growing. A friend of mine walked in. We got to chatting and during our chat, I coughed a juicy-sounding allergy cough. Here's the conversation:

Friend: Wow, you don't sound so good, are you okay?

I looked up to see her left eye winking at me at light speed. It took me a moment to realize she didn't have a twitch, then I forced myself to cough again.

Me: Yeah, I haven't been feeling so hot since I got back from Mexico.

Then I let out a huge 'hack' just for effect.

The reaction on some of the other customers' faces was priceless. A woman with her two young children couldn't get outta' the store fast enough. A few other people left as well. A woman told me it was an Oscar-worthy performance. The manager of the store said something to me to let me know he was annoyed that I cost him business. My response?

The last few phones your people have sold me have been crap so you're just lucky I'M still a customer. And I wouldn't be so quick to blame your customers for lack of business. I've seen plenty of people come and go since I've been here all because on the busiest day of the week, you decided that only three customer service people would be sufficient in helping a Saturday crowd. All of these desks should be filled with people being assisted. And what do you keep doing? You keep going back and forth between here and that closed door when you should be out here helping your employees. But no worries, I'll make sure that corporate knows how you treat your customers.

With that, he stormed off to that room behind the closed door...the walls are probably covered in kiddy porn. Just sayin'.

now just wait a cotton pickin' minute!!!

Nike Air Rift sneakers. Designed on the principle of the African runners who run barefoot. I'm not a runner but I do know cool when I see it! Very comfortable sneakers. Lightweight, feels like you're walking on air. Or in bare feet. Not really but they are comfortable.

When they first came out years ago, the were in the $80 to $90 range. I'd wanted a pair for a really long time but Nike doesn't make them in abundance anymore, the ones they do offer on their site are in ridiculous patterns, I'm not gonna' pay that kind of money for a houndstooth pattern on my sneakers and they're not sold in stores. So when I did a little Googling a week or so ago and found a pair for $65, no tax and no shipping and handling, I thought it was too good to be true.

Nevertheless, as I mentioned yesterday, I received my sneakers in the mail yesterday. All the way from Shanghai, China. Hmmm....

I was organizing my receipts earlier today to be filed away and I found the receipt to the shoes. On the bottom of the receipt were the following charges:

$314.00

$4.00 (shipping)

Total: $319.00


I'm sorry...

"Watchu talkin' about, Willis?!"

Clearly, this is not right. Not only did it say on the online form I filled out that one pair of Nike Air Rift sneakers cost $64.99 but I have a receipt to prove it.

Thankfully, I checked my credit card statement and the proper amount was listed on it. Phew! If anyone has any thoughts to what those charges are on the receipt provided with my sneakers, please feel free to enlighten me!

And if luck would have it...

As I was examining my credit card statement, I did happen to spot a strange charge on it! I called the number provided on my statement and the company sells running equipment.

Huh?! Last time I checked, I had exercise-induced asthma, bad knees and, oh yeah, I DON'T FUCKING RUN!!!!

I've never had to dispute a charge before. I called my credit card company and while I was on hold waiting for a customer service representative, I saw something odd about this transaction - it was made with my Suntrust Visa credit card. The very same one that should have stopped working once I activated my new Bank of America credit card.

Motherfuckers. Someone out there is dying to get their ass kicked.

So now I have to play the waiting game since it takes a payment period or two before the dispute is resolved. In the meantime, I was instructed to contact the merchant to find out WTF is going on. Since they don't have weekend working hours, I had to send an Email asking them to have a representative from their company respond to my Email so that this issue can be properly resolved.

Guess what?! Not ten minutes after sending the Email message to the company did I get a response back. Here's how it started:

Oh no! I am so sorry to hear that the auto renewal caught you off guard.

The charge is for your VIP membership renewal. As stated in your club handbook, this renewal is automatic for the convenience of our members. If we caught you by surprise, we apologize, this was not our intention.


*shakes head*

There's more but it would be pointless to bore you with the mindless words of a person who is clearly illiterate. What is it going to take to make this twat understand that I AM NOT, NOR HAVE I EVER BEEN, A FUCKING MEMBER AND I DIDN'T AUTHORIZE ANYONE TO MAKE ANY FUCKING CHARGES ON A NON-WORKING CREDIT CARD?!?!??!?!

This whole dispute is going to make me go on a murder rampage. Dumbassmotherfuckingdouchebagassmunchers.

i love my neighbors

While Schwartz and I were out today enjoying a leisurely stroll up and down our street in the gorgeous weather that is upon us, Little Mr. Fuckface my neighbor to the right of us suddenly appeared at his front door demanding that I keep my dog off his lawn. Despite the fact that I never let Schwartz do his business on this neighbor's lawn because I know what a fucker he is and that this man had just seen me pull my dog off his lawn, he still felt it necessary to be his usual pleasant self.

I looked up when he spoke and then turned my head away, choosing to ignore him. Here's the pleasantries we exchanged thereafter:

LMFF: Did you hear me?

Me: Did you hear this? *I flipped him off*

LMFF: If I see you on my lawn again, I'm calling Animal Control!

Me: *laughing* Really?! What are you going to say to them? "Hello? Animal Control? My neighbor, who walks her dog on a leash past my house everyday, allows her dog to touch my grass, please help me!". What are you going to do, show Animal Control the dog crap left on your lawn by your kids' dog and blame me for it?! Yeah, try it. See what happens.

*receiving the hairy eyeball from LMFF*

Me: Or maybe I should call the cops regarding that time I caught you peeping in my kitchen window at my kids. Because that is illegal. By the way, does your wife know what a pervert you are?!

Then I added loudly for effect..."C'mon Schwartz. The mean old man is constipated and doesn't want us on his lawn."

*LMFF goes inside and slams the front door*

Koolio shoots! She scores!

You know damn well whose house I'm walking by again and again, day after day. I've lived in this house going on ten years and that is about the fifth time he's ever spoken to me. The fucker has no idea who he's about to fuck with.

*insert evil laugh here*

more reasons not to like that "friend"

Allow me to start this post with the following statement...sometimes I really feel like I'm still back in high school with the horse shit that I have to deal with.

Last week "that friend" called me a few times. The first time, she called and I let it go to voicemail. She asked if she had the right baseball field where our kids were supposed to practice that afternoon and to only return the call if they were having practice elsewhere. She had the right field and I didn't return the call.

The next day, she called and I chose to let it go to voicemail again. She claimed she was calling to say 'hi' and to see how I was but after the first time she called, it dawned on me that a good bit of the time that she calls me it's to ask me something about baseball. If she would ever check her Email, in which the coach messages us at least once a day, she wouldn't have to call me about it but that's a whole other story. Anyway, because I had this revelation, I chose not to return her call. And also because I was going to see her two hours later for a baseball game.

The first thing out of her mouth when she saw me that afternoon was not "Hi, how are you?" but "I've been trying to call you." as if I shouldn't be hesitating to answer her calls. I told her I received her messages but I figured since we were going to see each other, I would just talk to her at the field. I ask y'all, is there anything wrong with that or do I need to be talking to her as I'm driving up to the baseball field and parking right next to her?! I guess that didn't sit well with her because instead of sitting next to me, she sat at the opposite end of the bleachers. Yeah, okay, whatever, I'm not at your beck and call, sister! I can't be bothered with someone being offended by something like that. I've got my own life with my own shit to deal with, if I stopped to answer every single fucking call that came in, I would never get anything done. Some people just really need to get over themselves.

At some point during the game, she complained that she was cold from the breeze. It was 75 degrees out, people. The breeze was warm and lovely and she was wearing heavy jeans with a long-sleeved shirt. I guess I shouldn't expect everyone to be warm-blooded. Anyway, she parked her car across the field so she would still have direct view of the game and where she could stay out of the frigid weather. *snicker* She called me periodically throughout the game to find out the inning and the score and during one of those conversations, we got onto the topic of how she wanted to take walks with me in the morning after we dropped the kids off at school. Cool, I'm always up for exercise and friendly conversation. She lives in a fabulous house on a very nice street but outside this little community near where our kids' school is located, is predominately lower class families and she refers to this area as 'the hood'. Not very nice but that's not the point. The point is, she's afraid to take walks in her own neighborhood by herself and the gal she usually walks with hasn't been interested in taking walks for the past few months. I mentioned since I'm already in the neighborhood at that time of day and that's the best time of day for me to walk, that I would walk with her since I enjoy the exercise as well. Suddenly, it was all on her terms. Suddenly, she had to do this, that and the other thing in the morning and the best time for her to walk was in the afternoon right before we picked up our kids from school.

Listen up, you fucking bitch! I just offered to walk with you because you're petrified to do it alone. I told you when I could do it and it wasn't up for debate, so if you want me to keep you company so that you're not frightened of your own fucking neighbors, you'll walk when I can walk! I'm doing you a fucking favor, fuck-ryingoutloud!

Rrrrrrrrr.

Anyway, back to the story...

I was sitting here today waiting for my kids to return home from their dad's, and the evil demon-child from across the street rang the bell. I expected him to ring my bell 'til it was broken because that's usually what he does just because he gets extreme pleasure out of watching our dog go into a Cujo-frenzy, barking 'til he's horse. He gets sick pleasure out of torturing our dog. Can you say "future serial killer"?!

In any case, whenever I'm home alone, I don't answer the door for anyone, especially that child. I do not care for him one bit. There are many reasons behind this but I will only mention one of them since it pertains to "that friend".

A month or so ago, we saw the demon-child's mother at the same baseball field that our kids were practicing at. I asked "that friend" who used to live in this subdivision and who is friendly with the child's mother (if y'all recall, this is the only person whom "that friend" would move back to this subdivision for) what she thought about the demon-child. She paused for awhile to search for the right words so I knew she felt the same about him as I. I told her some of the things that he's done and she seemed equally annoyed with him.

Let me stop there for a minute to tell you a little bit about myself. If someone confides in me for any reason, I will always hold that confidence. I am a very trustworthy person and unless you tell me it's okay to mention something to others, I do not say a word. Ever.

So the demon-child came to my house this afternoon and rang the bell. I thought it was my kids coming home the way the dog was barking and all, but it was that evil thing and I luckily retreated back here to my desk without being seen. I waited and waited, expecting the incessant bell-ringing to commence. It did not. About ten minutes later it dawned on me..."that fucking cunt friend" told his mother what I said about her child!!!

Now I know what some of you are saying, "Before you accuse anyone, are you sure that she told the mother?" and I can honestly say without going over there and asking the demon-child's mother myself, I am 100% sure she told her. I mean seriously folks, why else would this kid just suddenly change his ways when he gets so much pleasure out of watching my dog go nuts? There's really no other explanation. I [unfortunately] know how this kid's mind works.

For all those out there who are reluctant to believe how positive I am that "that friend" told my neighbor, here's proof...there have been times before where I've discussed personal things about the person who shall not be mentioned here with "that friend" only for her to tell me that she was going to talk to him about what I had spoken about just to try to help resolve things between us even after I told her not to say anything. I'm pretty sure she never opened up her mouth because the person who shall not be mentioned here is not afraid to give me an earful if he's heard or seen something I've done that has anything to do with him but even so, I can fight my own battles, thankyouverymuch!! If I wanted to resolve anything with him, I would do it myself not through some third party who clearly doesn't know her asshole from her elbow.

This is my fucking neighbor! She lives directly across the street from me and I see her every day. Do you know how this makes me look and feel?!

I'll conclude this post with one question: how fucking more uncool can one person be?

i'm all done

Not with blogging, with that airhead "friend" of mine.

Last I mentioned, she had asked me to call her to get together this weekend. I had waited all week thinking about whether or not I should do it and I chose to suck it up yesterday afternoon and called her.

I don't know what her deal was, but she was less than friendly on the phone. Between that and the way she talked to me on Monday night, seemingly all happy to see me and wanting to plan something, she reminded me of Dr. Jekyll and Mrs. Hyde.

Our kids have an Easter/Passover break of five days. It seems that minutes after we talked about potentially planning something for this weekend, she forgot all about that and planned a weekend getaway with her family. That's fine, it's her family and it's not like she shouldn't be permitted to go away with family. She also owes me nothing but I guess expecting a little common decency is too much to ask. After the tone in which she used with me on the phone, I feel like a total fool for falling for her shit.

Anyway, I've washed my hands of her. I guess sometimes it takes these experiences to open our eyes to the heart of the matter and I'll chalk it up just that.

whisper down the lane

Remember that children's game where you sit in a line, someone starts off whispering something and by the time it reaches the last person, it becomes something entirely different than what was originally said?

On Monday, I received a very disturbing phone call from a friend of mine, a mother of a girl in my daughter's class. She told me that she'd gotten a call from another mother in the class that my daughter was bullying her daughter and that her daughter was "very scared" of my daughter.

I can't recall if I blogged about the time several months ago where I got a call from the guidance counselor how my daughter had been doing some bullying. Either way, I was mortified to know this about my daughter. As a young girl, I was bullied by kids for the glasses I wore and only finally stood up for myself in the 7th grade against that little Oompa Loompa-sized dork, Kipp Cohen after calling me a four-eyed caboose and I told him "Shut up, brace face!". That was the last time Kipp Cohen ever spoke to me. I can still see the expression on his face when he realized I fought back. Ahhh, priceless.

Anyway, because my daughter is a sweet girl in general (don't get me wrong, she has her moments!) and, most of the time, respectful of others, she was given a slap on her wrist, told how inappropriate it was to say certain things and let go with a warning not to do it again. Later on that same day, I made her promise to me that she would never do that again and that I took promises seriously so if she promised, she had to keep it. She promised. And I believe her.

So when I got this phone call, you can imagine how my blood started to boil. I had already thought about all the things and privileges I was going to take away from her after just hearing this from someone whom I knew was a gossip and doesn't get all her facts straight.

Before school let out on Monday afternoon, I was able to find some alone time with my daughter's teacher and assistant teacher. We sat down, I spoke and they both sat there looking dumbfounded. They hadn't heard squat about my daughter doing any such thing, nor had anyone reported her, nor did they really think my daughter had any opportunity during the day to behave in such a manner since there was always a teacher around, teachers are supposed to report such incidences and there were no said reports against my daughter. In fact, they said that she was delightful to have in class, that she was really keeping to herself, doing her work diligently and accurately and was the most improved student of all the kids in the class.

*blank stare*

I didn't know what to say especially since I never expected to get such a favorable report after hearing potentially bad news. They assured me that they would do some digging but that most of the kids in the class were very good about reporting others if they acted out (yeah, those freakin' tattle-tales!) and they honestly hadn't heard anything. It really was quite the odd meeting!

I left feeling very bad that I would go souly on the word of a gossip-monger and that I thought my child would be guilty of something before finding out the truth. Coincidentally enough, as I was leaving the building, I ran into the mother of the girl who said my daughter was bullying her! I stopped her to talk to her and was not about to apologize to her for anything until I finished my investigation into the matter. She was on her way in to meet with the principal as her daughter, the same one who was accusing my daughter of hurting her, was doing very poorly in school and because of that, everything else negative that happened in her life was greatly magnified. In other words, she was blowing shit outta' proportion.

Hmmmm...I had a feeling right then and there that her daughter was a little fucking liar.

Prior to my meeting with my daughter's teacher, I had already contacted the guidance counselor. She got back to me later on in the day and I met with her yesterday morning. She, too, had done some investigating and neither saw or heard anything wrong with my daughter. In fact, again, quite the opposite and she said how everyone was so proud of her. Talk about a sense of relief!

She also said that the girl in question has quite a way of dramatizing things. And with three other sisters, she was most likely doing it to get attention. She said she would bring her in to talk about. I told her that I didn't feel it was a good idea to bring my daughter in with her. After all the positive changes my daughter has gone through, I would hate for her to feel shot down if she found out someone was making up stories about her. The guidance counselor agreed.

She also assured me that the little girl doing the accusing is not scared about anything. That she knows how to stick up for herself just fine and it was probably just a case of perception. Regardless, if that little girl every tries to fuck with my daughter again, I'M gonna' kick her ass myself!

stuck on stupid

For those of you not on Facebook, this will take some explaining. So, once again, grab your beverage of choice and chillax. God, I hate that word but yes, I did in fact use it.

A long, long time ago, on an Internet dating site based out of Beverly Hills, California, I "met" a woman we'll call "Fucked-up Nutcase". Yes, I made more women friends than met actual men. Go figure.

Anyway, FUN and I chatted, became "friends" and eventually and occasionally Emailed off the site. We had a falling out, my mind escapes me exactly what occurred, but nevertheless, she acted fruity and I told her that I was losing her Email address. Fast.

Fast forward to early fall when she requested to be added to my Facebook friend's list. I actually had to ask around for someone to remind me who she was! When I found out, I waited several days before adding her to my list, weighing the pros and cons of doing so. I hesitated for a reason, I only wish I had listened to my conscience then.

Facebook has a gazillion and a half of these stupid game applications that you can log into, one of which is called Celebrity Agent. Now let's stop for a moment and think about what a celebrity agent actually does. An agent represents celebrities. It's a cut throat business in which agents are always trying to scam other agents out of their clients because the entire business is about making more money than ten million Donald Trumps put together.

So what is the point of this game? To start, you select six celebrities. You then invite friends to participate because you need those friends to what? What?! That's right, steal from them. And on top of stealing the celebrity in question, you have the option of locking them in for a certain amount of time so that said celebrity cannot be stolen away from you right away. All very exciting, lemme' tell you. *rolls eyes*

So FUN is on my list of people I play against and over just the last few days she's up $20K. So as a celebrity agent, what do I do? I check out her celebrities to find her money-maker celeb. I find her and I swipe her. Fast and hard, hitting below the belt by locking her. Bwahahaha! She's mine!

I leave home to go watch my daughter play in her hockey game and arrive back awhile later to find a crazy-assed IM from FUN. It read:

Miss Koolio...what ya' doin'? I see Obama on your list all the time, he's available and I don't take him...because I don't do that to friends.

*blank stare*

Did I forget to mention that this lunatic is over 50 years old?! I really hope she's not wondering why she's still single. But that's beside the point.

Anyway, I responded to her IM with an Email. In true Koolio form, it was entitled GET OVER IT. Heh.

Of all the people on here, I never expected YOU to whine about PLAYING A GAME. Since it seems you never read the purpose behind Celebrity Agent, you are supposed to steal others celebs in order to make money. I was playing the GAME, you're just kvetching about it.

Honestly, I am very surprised with myself for even dignifying your ridiculousness over such a thing with a reply but even more surprised that you're acting like a 3 year old. Go throw your tizzy elsewhere, I'm not interested.

With that, I deleted her from my friend's list. Silly perhaps, but if I have one less crackpot in my life, the better it is for me. Then I wrote in my status bar...

Koolio says FYI - if you contact me to whine about how you think I'm not playing an FB GAME fairly, I have 3 words for you - GROW UP and "defriend". Have a nice day.

Her response to me:

Koolio...You're right not to have expected me to whine...I wasn't whining in fact I'm surprised u took the remark so seriously.

STOP! Just back the fuck up!! Did I misread something when she sent me an IM clearly complaining to me about my playing the game in what she thought was an unfair manner? Please, someone tell me! And if she wasn't serious, then what was the purpose of sending me the IM in the first place?!

She continued:

Your prerogative, of course...and if you ever feel like being on my list again, feel free.

Okay, that last part was laughable. If I ever want to be on her list again? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?! How was she able to turn this around on me and make me look like I was to blame for her bad behavior?!

I'm undecided as to whether I should ream her out or move on. On one hand, reaming her out would be so fulfilling, on the other hand, haven't I wasted enough time on this fucknut??!

Oh by the way...I'm making a buttload of money off that celeb I stole from her! And the sweet part about the whole thing is that she's no longer on my friend's list which means she's no longer someone who can play against me in Celebrity Agent and she can't steal her celeb back.

Ahh, sweet reward. *insert big evil grin here*

apparently i'm chopped liver

I have this friend. We'll call her Connie Clueless. She's very sweet, has a great personality and is a good conversationalist.

Even though she speaks like she's just sucked in helium which makes it sound like she's a total ditz.

But after yesterday, I know for a fact that she is a ditz!

I feel bad for her. About a year ago, her husband was introduced to that awful World of Warcraft and is addicted to it. He comes home, eats dinner and then spends about five hours on the computer into the wee hours of morning. He and my friend don't spend any alone time together anymore, don't go out together, fight about time spent and not being spent with one another, etc.. He's more in love with his WoW than his own wife.

Connie is from Phoenix, Arizona and speaks fondly of it often. She has a few friends here but no one she can really call close. She doesn't like it here and as often as she praises Phoenix does she put down this city. She feels alone and lonely and wants desperately to return to her hometown.

With or without her husband.

I speak to her often and we talk about everything. She has confided in me about her feelings on her life here and her frustrations with her husband and the new love in his life. We talked yesterday, I listened and made a few suggestions about possibly resolving things with her husband and if not with him, then with herself. That friends are great to talk to but therapists can sometimes enlighten us and help things fall into place. I told her, in all seriousness, that she should consider suing the makers of World of Warcraft for breaking up her marriage and frankly, I think she'd have a case. I told her if her husband doesn't have an interest in going out with her, she should plan a girl's night out from time-to-time.

Pay special attention to that last line!

So she said "I don't know. I'm not sure I feel comfortable doing that. All my friends are married with families and have their own things to do."

*blank stare*

Interesting...last time I checked the ink on my 2002 divorce agreement was very dry.

If it weren't for the fact that this is the second time she's said something along those lines to me I'd find it funny, but now I take it personally.

So...if she doesn't consider me a friend, then WTF am I?! What have I been, a pseudo-wannabe-therapist handing out free advice?! I mean, what would y'all call it?! And then there's the question of if she doesn't consider me a friend, do I simply humor myself by continuing to talk to her or stop putting forth my share in the friendship?

This situation is exactly why I am so untrusting of people. As nasty and rude as I can be on here, I am a good friend which sometimes translates for some to take advantage of my kindness.

Motherfuckers.

support your local geeks

This is a warning to all you Best Buy shoppers - Best Buy is great when it comes to reasonably-priced household appliances and techy gadgets and gizmos, but do NOT, under ANY circumstances, take your computers to The Geek Squad.

Take it from this dissatisfied customer, it's not worth the temper tantrum you will throw.

I thought I had written back in January about my son's computer problems, but either I'm blind, which is always a possibility, and can't find the post or I didn't actually write about it. In any case, my son's computer browser stopped working and he couldn't access the Internet which meant that he couldn't play his Internet games or AIM his friends. Gasp! The horror! Anyway, I took it to Best Buy to have it evaluated by The Geek Squad. The way I figured it was the computer was still considered new since I had just purchased it in September, and it was under warranty so if it needed fixing, they could fix it and it wouldn't cost me that much in the process.

The latter is a misconception. The Geek Squad is not part of Best Buy, they only rent space from them so Best Buy endorses them. The Geek Squad was not willing to offer me any great deals just because I had purchased the computer from the same store they were in. Fuckers.

But that's not really the beef I have with them.

Two weeks ago today I dropped the computer off for a full diagnostic. The first expected completion date read January 31st - one week since dropping off the computer. On a separate piece of paper, the expected completion date read February 2nd. Either/or, it was past both expected completion dates and I was determined to find out once and for all WTF was going on with the computer!

Deep inside, however, my psychic abilities had already kicked it into high gear and I knew before I even entered the store yesterday that they hadn't even touched my computer. Sure enough, I was right.

The geek punched in my information, returned from the back room where they store the computers needing work with an "Uh oh, this 'puter ain't done!" expression on his face and broke the bad news to me. I gestured to him to give me my computer, I was taking it with me. At the same time, I told him I wanted to speak to a store manager. Not quite sure why it took him five more minutes to plug in information into their computers, get me the computer and then get me a manager, but it did.

Why did I want the store manager? Well, aside from the fact that they hadn't fixed my computer in the alloted timeframe, I had tried calling the store five separate times on Monday afternoon to find out the status on my computer, each time waiting several minutes for someone to answer and no one ever answered the fucking phone. Not at the Geek Squad desk nor any sales associate within the entire store. I tried calling once a day thereafter and even then, no one ever answered the fucking phone.

I'm talking Best Buy here, people! I'm not talking some little mom-and-pop set-up where one person at a time occupies the store and may need to leave on his lunch break, I'm talking a big fucking store with at least 50 employees working the store at a time. Not one of them was able to answer the phone?!

He got my computer and went over to a fellow geek who came over to see me. "What seems to be the problem?" he asked.

Aside from global warming and there not being world peace, I told him that it was a problem that I asked for a store manager and that given the 'Geek Squad' printed on his shirt, clearly he was not a store manager. But I told him what the problem was anyway and he asked me "Well, didn't the person who helped you tell you that it was a 3-4 week turnaround time?". NOTE: everything in italics except for the cursing, were my exact words...

No [dipshit]. I was told a 1-2 week turnaround time and if the guy assisting me had told me it would have been a 3-4 week turnaround time, then I most certainly would have not left my computer here.

"Even so," he said, "It clearly states on the contract you signed that we're entitled to change the turnaround time at our descretion."

And clearly, [asshole], if you tell someone that you will have it done for them within a certain timeframe, then you either have it done for them or you learn how to pick up that little device otherwise known as a 'telephone' and give what's called a 'courtesy call' so that the person isn't wondering where their computer is. But given that I tried calling you guys several times this week alone and there's not a phone anywhere on your counter here, I can understand why you wouldn't even think of calling me to inform me about my computer or would have heard your phone ringing because you don't have a [fucking] phone! Now get me a store manager!

Having waited another five minutes, I saw out of the corner of my eye a store manager approach the counter.

"Yeah?". (No seriously, that's how the store manager greeted me.)

I gave her the evil death glare. I tried to get deathly, skin-piercing laser beams to shoot from my eyeballs but my Super Duper Skin-piercing Eye Laser Beams must have been on the fritz.

"Yeah"? That's how you greet your customers?

Staring. "What can I help you with, ma'am?".

Oh there's the proper customer service you must have briefly lost along with your brain cells! (yes, I did say that, too.)

I then explained again what happened but emphasized the phone calling and how no one in her store answered.

"Oh...sorry."

That's all you have to say?!

"Hmmm...well, we're very busy."

Honestly folks, I thought I was being punked and that someone from the new and improved Candid Camera show was going to jump out and surprise me that all this professionalism I was being treated with was just a really bad joke being played on me.

We're all busy, you moron! I yelled at her, grabbed my receipt, got her name and the Geek Squad manager's name so I can report them later to Best Buy's corporate headquarters, called them "incompetent idiots" (redundant, I know), not only at full volume but also made sure to enunciate so that everyone within a 100 foot radius could hear me clearly.

Upon walking away, I heard her wishing me a great day in the most sarcastic voice I've ever heard. She is who they hired to manage the store. Brilliant. I guess she thinks that after I'm done reporting her to the company that she'll still have a job by the end of the week.

But the story's not done.

I whisked my computer away to a small mom-and-pop computer shop that I had taken my computer to once before. At 4pm yesterday afternoon, Tweaks by Geeks had fixed my son's computer.

WHAT!!

did i say i sometimes hated people? my bad, i meant that sometimes i really fucking hated people!

Let me just give y'all a little disclaimer here...not only am I twitching and itching, getting ready to jump outta' my skin over something that happened this evening, but I'm close to receiving my monthly "bill" and that certainly hasn't helped matters at all. As with all my rants, when I'm this super pissed I tend to curse excessively so be prepared to bleach out your eye sockets when you're done reading! I also tend to rant for, like, forever, so if you don't like lengthy posts pass this one right by. If you do, then grab your beverage of choice and sit still for a few minutes.

Let's go back in time, shall we? October 29th, 2008 to be exact. My old cell phone was slowly but surely falling apart and I was tired of trying to listen people through white noise static. I went to my local cell phone provider, whom I've been a loyal customer of for the past twelve or so years, and explained my situation to them. As a long-time loyal customer, I was offered a free phone as has been the case numerous times in the past.

The phone I chose, as I have before, is a simple phone. I don't need a Blackberry or any other device that allows me to put on it my Last Will and Testament, access my Swiss bank accounts (yeah, don't I wish!), offer my latest dump measurements or add my newest gourmet recipes (like I can even cook!) nor do I need one that can shoot laser beams in all directions. Not that there's a phone that can actually shoot laser beams but that would be cool, wouldn't it?! Anyway, just give me a fucking phone that can save all my contacts and I'm a happy camper.

Well, let's just say that since early November 2008, this happy camper has been ready to don an old hockey mask, change her name to "Jason" and walk around killing off whomever dares come in close proximity.

My newest cell phone has never worked right. Almost right off the bat, people spoke like they were under water and I heard from more than one person how rude I was because I kept asking "What?" to every question asked. Did I build this fucking cell phone you turd nuggets?! I apologized anyway because that's what nice people do. Oh shut up, I am too nice!

Since October, I have also had a very weak signal inside my home. Because I am an ancient fart and still use dial-up for my computer, I require my cell phone at all times while my land line is tied up with the computer and I require that my cell phone actually works. So I waited and waited and last week I felt I had waited long enough. I went into the cell phone provider to tell them that my phone was a piece of crap (exact words) and that something needed to be done to resolve my cell phone issues.

Now, I can understand how that would come across...if I was the only one dealing with such a problem but there were two other people in the store at the exact same time with the exact same issues with their phones. And the people who worked there were less than helpful because no one really knew what the problem was or could be. Try a new SIM card? Sure, why not! Not quite sure what a SIM card would have to do with the weak signal inside my house but sure, I'll try anything at least once! *wink wink, nudge nudge*

They wouldn't give me a free phone because the phone was too new. Unfortunately, all the phones advertised as FREE were actually quite expensive and I wasn't about to dish out money for that kind of crazy shit! Last but not least, they took my name and address down and PROMISED that within the week, I would hear from a technician who would come out to my house to make sure it was not a cell tower issue in my area. Do you think I ever heard from that technician? I'm wondering if I'd held my breath if that would have helped the situation?! Or maybe I'd just be a dead, dissatisfied cell phone-user.

The latest and greatest to happen to this POS phone I have is that starting today, it no longer allows me to make out-going calls while I'm inside my house. Nope, all I get is that ear-piercing beeping in my ear followed by the ever-popular 'network busy' message flashing on my phone screen.

So I called the provider and basically told them "Fix my phone NOW or eat shit!". Well, fixing my fine right this very instant was not possible because, as far as I know, there is no way to teleport ourselves from here to there and make things better all in the matter of a minute. First, I let loose on a customer service TECH. Had I known that he was just a tech and couldn't help me with my account or any customer service issues, I wouldn't have wasted half my life telling him what was going on. And when I couldn't stand to hear him say for the umpteenth time "I completely understand how you feel.", I asked him to put me through to someone who would actually do something for me.

I wound up with Caroline who was so helpful, I would have reached through the phone and given her a sloppy wet kiss on her girly region had I been able to. She hooked me up with a brand new state-of-the-art cell phone FREE OF FUCKING CHARGE. Now how's THAT for service with a smile?! Of course I won't actually get to lay my hands on that phone 'til mid-week but I guess I can't expect Caroline to walk on water for me or change water into wine. She should be able to do just that but I guess I'll just settle for the free phone. *wink*

Then there's my kids' computer. *sigh* Does everyone remember that fiasco when school was in session, my son needed his computer for school work but neither of my kids happened to mention to me that their existing computer was shot to hell and I had to fork over the big bucks for a new one? Remember how easy a time I had with the purchase and the numerous issues that followed? Well, now there's yet another issue with it.

The other night, out of the clear blue, the browser stopped working. According to the phone company that I purchased the DSL from, they could see from their end that the Internet connection was working just fine but it seems that the wonderful security software I was encouraged to buy from salesperson A at Best Buy, claiming that it was the latest and greatest security software on the market, has allowed a virus in to fuck with the computer. Apparently, this phone company has seen this type of problem on numerous occasions before with this software. Now I have to take the computer back to Best Buy tomorrow so they can figure out the fucking problem and so that I can rip them a new asshole about being told that I was purchasing a great security software package that allows viruses in instead of keeping them out! Motherfuckers!! It will get resolved but nevertheless, another headache to be dealt with.

Last night my son had his fourth basketball game. His team has won all four of their games so far and are really proving to be a great team. But that's not why I'm pissed and this time it has to do with a person and not technology.

Back in the fall during my son's football season, I befriended this gal, another mother of a player. I had met her briefly last year through another friend and in the fall, we really became decent friends.

Lately, we've been doing some stuff together, the movies, drinks, etc.. However, last night something was wrong and the Ice Princess as I now have dubbed her, was completely foreign to me.

I took into consideration that her mother is currently dealing with some health issues and that she may have been preoccupied with that so I gave her the benefit of the doubt. That was after she climbed onto the bleachers on my side and walked across me to sit by the side of the friend I met her through. Kinda' rude if you ask me but these two are as thick as thieves so no big deal. We can't all have the strong, tight friendships we'd like to have.

The IP barely spoke to me, in fact, now that I look back on last night, she only spoke to me when I spoke to her. Never once did she initiate conversation with me. Not to make excuses for her but she did seem to be a little out of sorts and when I called her today to tell her that my daughter wanted to see "Twilight" again and asked if she'd care to join us (she's seen the movie about 20 times!), she said she had come down with something and it wasn't likely that she'd leave the house. She told me that our mutual friend, the one whom she sat beside at the game last night, was going and to call her but I bailed saying that my daughter was probably going to be tired from her soccer practice this evening, told her we'd do it another time and wished her well.

Not an hour later, I got a call on my cell phone from her cell phone. Yeah, she felt so sick that she was out and probably going to see that very movie with our mutual friend. I tried to call her back from my cell phone but, of course, I got my favorite 'network busy' message flashing it's evilness at me. I called her from my house phone and do you know the bitch hung up on me!

Now, I know the difference between an accidental disconnected call and someone hanging up, and that was a hang up. I thought I had gotten the wrong number but sure enough, when I checked, it was the right number and I called back. Do you know that fucking crusty cunt forwarded me to her voicemail?!

I called her house and left the following message on her voicemail...

IP, it is about 8:10 on Friday night. I saw that you tried to call me on my cell phone but, as you know, it's not working right and not only could I not hear you but when I tried to call you back several times from my cell phone it kept giving me a 'network busy' message, the newest of my problems with my phone. I tried calling you from my house phone but you hung up on me the first time and sent me to voicemail the second time. Not sure what I did to deserve that kind of treatment but nevertheless I'm not pleased with it. There really isn't a reason for you to return my call because such rude behavior towards me won't be tolerated.

- CLICK -

I don't know about you, but I'm fairly certain I made myself very clear.

Not two seconds later, my house phone rang and it was she. By that time, I was already logging onto my computer and its connection cut her off. I know I have a voicemail or at least a partial one, but chances are it will be deleted without being heard. As for her reaction to my voicemail? I always anticipate the worst and I always plan my comebacks well in advance just in case. I'm not sure I'll have to use them or even waste my time using them because at this point, I'm not even sure she's worth my friendship.

Yes, the latter is really what has gotten me into a tizzy this evening because, as in my last post, I am not deserving of this kind of treatment. I may sound like a royal fucking twathole on here but in real life, I can be such a great friend to people if they allow me.

With regards to my last post, thank you to all those who responded and offered me their opinions. I have always felt that those removed from a situation can always see things more clearly and I was glad to have received all of your well-thought-out responses.

HOWEVER...

Just a little while ago this evening, my phone rang and it was my long lost lusted-after friend whom I thought had blown me off like a human tumbleweed. He called to see how I was doing and to tell me details of what was going on. So I wanted y'all to see with your own eyes that I retract everything negative I said about him because as a few of you wrote, he's just dealing with this shit and can't be bothered with anyone or anything that doesn't have to do with his present situation.

Rant over. In the immortal words of Captain Jean-Luc Picard of the Star Ship Enterprise, "As you were."!!!!

and let the stress begin

I wasn't going to write one of my infamous family posts until shortly before I was to leave next week, but my parents already started with me today about something so I figured now was as good a time as any to get into it and try to write off some of the stress I'm already starting to feel.

For those of you who haven't been reading me long, let me just put it this way...if I could trade my family in for a new one tomorrow, I would jump at the chance to do so. In a nutshell, my sister has a chemical imbalance that she chooses not to acknowledge and my parents are selfish social status snobs whom I've grown to dislike increasingly over the years.

Let me begin the story...

Since my son was born, we have "vacationed" (ha ha) at my parents' place every spring. When my children began school, it became their spring break. So when my ex asked me a few months ago if he could take them this spring break, I certainly wasn't going to deny him that right. Besides, my kids have expressed to me in recent years and recently to their dad, that they are getting tired of having to visit my family because there's nothing overly exciting for them to do there (which is true) and frankly, they're getting tired of vacationing with a grandmother who has to set all activities by such a rigid schedule.

Spring break. Three months away. My kids called my parents today to thank them for sending them monetary gifts for Hanukkah. Afterwards, my parents wanted to talk to me about how much fun (choke, gag, cough) the kids are going to have while visiting and my mother mentioned that they had just bought my son spring training tickets to the Boston Red Sox game.

Yikes!

I was waiting to get down there to tell them that we wouldn't be visiting for spring break because I honestly wanted to watch my sister throw one of her fits when she found out she wasn't going to get her way and get to see the kids in the spring. I know, I'm a mean bitch, sue me!

So I told my parents that my ex was taking the kids away for spring break and they tried every excuse in the book why he wasn't allowed, as if their rights as grandparents come before his rights as their father!

1. We already bought the baseball tickets. (yes and there are many Red Sox fans out there who would LOVE to have those tickets!)
2. He has them for Thanksgiving and Christmas. (actually, we take turns every year with Thanksgiving and he's entitled to celebrate Christmas with his own children even if that means they miss a little bit of Hanukkah on the off-chance that Hanukkah and Christmas fall at the same time of year.)
3. They'll miss being in the warm climate. (actually, no they won't because they're vacationing in the same warm climate...just not with you!)

But that doesn't really paint a complete picture of how fucked up my family really is. No, let me take you back to the time that my son was born and I was suffering from post-partum depression...

My mother came to visit the weekend we brought him home from the hospital and as helpful as she was trying to be, she was driving me nuts! I'd ask her not to do something, to just sit and enjoy her new grandson and I would turn my back for two seconds to find that she went ahead and did exactly what I asked her not to do.

Like all newborns, my son was losing weight in the beginning only he was one of those children who continued to lose so the doctors were keeping an eye on him and he had an appointment every other day to be weighed and examined. One of those times, I asked my ex to take my mom and my son to the doctor so I could get some peace. My mother returned, pulled me aside and told me my son was dying. Oh yes she did!!

That's when I completely broke down and told my ex to take me back to the hospital. He assured me that the doctors never said any such thing about our son dying. He then called my father, explained to him what was happening and that he needed to talk to his wife. "I don't need to talk to her, she's only trying to help."! Help?! Help do what, put her daughter in the looney bin?!

For those of you who weren't reading my blog in August, the kids and I were just days away from leaving on a trip to visit my family when I fell down some steps while pet-sitting a neighbor's dog and I broke both my ankles. As upset as I was, I looked at it as a blessing that I wouldn't have to visit only for my family to tell me the very next day that they were coming here!

Before my sister got on the plane to come here, she called me and told me that her visit was not a social one. That she was here to help me do whatever I needed her help with and then she proceeded to chew me out about what an unappreciative bitch I was because I hadn't thanked her enough for what she was doing for me. Apparently, the five+ times I did thank her wasn't acceptable.

Then, a cousin who has always been closer to my sister and never calls me, called me to see how I was doing. But not before she put my sister high on a pedestal, praising her for being so nice to me. Oh gee, could my sister have possible called her to complain to her about how unappreciative I was?! No, she couldn't have!! *rolls eyes*

From the moment my sister set foot in my house, the tension hung heavy in the air. The day after she and my mom arrived, I recalled what she said about helping me with anything so I asked her to take some cans out to my garage to the recycling bin and she flipped her lid and stomped off to my garage where she proceeded to throw one of her psychotic tantrums she's famous for before coming in and refusing to help me with my recycling. While she was throwing her tantrum, I turned to my mother and told her what my sister had said to me before visiting and then told her that she better have a serious talk with my sister about the behavior she chose to exhibit in my house in front of my kids or she would be leaving and not welcome back. I'm certain my mother never had that discussion with her.

Not long after that, did my son accidentally spill a minute amount of water on my sister's cell phone. God forbid anyone should do anything to her precious cell phone which she rudely carries around with her wherever she goes with it super-glued to her ear at all times. At the same time that my son accidentally spilled water on her phone, he did so on the kitchen floor. My sister magically found the small droplets of water that hit the ground and she did the same, right on her fat ass. My back was turned when I heard The Thud Heard 'Round the World, I turned and sincerely asked what happened when she snapped and said "You know exactly what happened you bitch!". Yes, in front of my kids.

Needless to say, that was the straw that broke the camel's back and I ordered her out of the house. I screamed at her as she very much deserved it and she was taken aback. Then she decided to do a little screaming of her own, getting in my face, threatening me that she was going to take my children away from me, blah, blah, blah, all the while, my mother telling me to stop it. Y'all, I'm telling you, you would have loved to see this shit in action!

Between being incapacitated from the accident and that bullshit of dealing with that crusty cunt of a sister, clearly, I was upset. I turned to my father thinking he would help me only for him to say to me several times "Either tell them to leave or deal with it." Nice, caring advice for a father to give to someone he supposedly loves, right?! Still balling my eyes out, he finally yelled at me and I chose to hang up on him. I heard my mother's cell phone ringing and then heard my sister saying awful things at full volume right in front of my kids.

The story does end, just not yet!

Then my mother angrily came into my room, "How dare you make your father yell at me when he's just had surgery!!". Make him yell at me?! Oh yesI held a gun to his temple while him to scream at me, egging him on to see how many stitches he could pop! I told my mother not to blame beggingme for my father not having control of his temper and that just because she loved my sister more than me, she had no right to be treating me in such a way.

Well, it would seem I caught her a little off-guard with what I had said to her and she backed down a bit. She asked me if she and my sister could take my kids to a movie and I told them if they didn't apologize to me for the way they were treating me in my house, they wouldn't be taking my kids anywhere and reminded her what my sister told me, that this wasn't a social visit. By the expression on my mother's face, clearly she was unaware of the verbal raping my sister gave me before they arrived.

At the exact moment that my mother felt it was okay to offer me an apology and came back into my room to apologize, she was interrupted by my ex who was loudly chewing me out over the phone, reminding me about a blog I once had that he mistakingly found and felt forced to threaten a lawsuit against me because I was talking trash (aka the truth) about he, his wife and his family, how hateful a person I was and that I should die a thousand painful deaths.

I'm telling ya', does my family know how to put the "fun" in "dysfunctional", or what?!?!??!

Eventually, my mom had the chance to apologize and my sister "apologized" as well. The next day, their last day being here, my sister didn't say "boo" to me and we haven't spoken since. Again, that was August.

Oh and my father? He ignored me for the entire month. There I was, calling him every day to check on him after he had major intestinal surgery, and my own father couldn't suck it up and get over the fact that yes, maybe he was wrong at yelling at his daughter when she was at her lowest point, injured and depressed.

I'm sure you can imagine why I get so stressed when I have these visits with my family and while I would like to be able to make the best of things, I'm predicting many uncomfortable situations to befall me next week...

My sister trying to talk to me, for one.. I already decided back in August that I no longer want a relationship with my her. Too much shit has happened between us, she has been an awful person to me my entire life and there are too many things that can no longer be forgotten or forgiven. For instance, she tried to kill me when I was just days old. If my mother hadn't walked into the room when she did, my sister would have succeeded in murdering her baby sister. She chased me around the house with a knife on more than one occasion when we were little. She would do things to me like physically abuse me, then act like I had done something to her and I would be the one to get punished. She would steal personal items of mine and then when I would find them stashed in her room, who do you think would get punished for trespassing?! I'll give you a hint...not her!

I will be as civil as I possibly can be given the hate I feel for her, but I have a strong feeling that my parents will pull me aside and insist that I make up with her. If that happens, I'm afraid I'll have to burst their little fantasy bubble because it will never happen. I'm 40 years old and I'm old enough to decide who I want in my life and who I want, well, dead. And yes, if my sister were to die tomorrow, I would not shed a single tear for her. They can side with her all they want and believe all the bullshit tales that flow from her lying tongue, I will never budge for them as I've done more than my share of things to appease them over the years and I'm done with this shit!

Now can you see why I enjoy these family "vacations" so much?!